1. While working at Best Buy, a woman came in complaining that her iPod had a virus. I turn it on and it appears to be working fine. She says it only shows up when she connects it to her PC, so I hook it up to our machine. Once connected, the \u201cDo not disconnect\u201d message appears, complete with red \u201cno\u201d symbol. She says excitedly, \u201cThere! That\u2019s the virus! What does that mean?\u201d<\/p>\n
2. Nothing is more amusing than listening to an IHOP waiter try to explain to a customer why they can\u2019t order \u201cNever Ending Pancakes\u201d to go. Unless you\u2019re that waiter, of course.<\/p>\n
\u201cYes, we do. Which version would you like?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cThe Bible.\u201d \u201cYes, I understand, which version?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cThe one Jesus wrote.\u201d<\/p>\n
4. I was working at a fast food restaurant when a customer came in asking for a cheeseburger, medium fry, and medium drink. I said \u201cOk, I\u2019ll ring you up for a #1 combo meal.\u201d This angered the lady, who told me that she didn\u2019t want the combo meal, just a cheeseburger, a medium fry, and a medium drink. I told her that it would be the same order but that it would save her money. She got even more furious with me so I politely punched in the items separately.<\/p>\n
5. I received this call while working at Starbucks.<\/p>\n
\u201cThank you for calling Starbucks, this is Jeff, how can I help you?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cYes, where are you located?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWe\u2019re at the corner of Main and Magnolia.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cAnd where is that?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cDo you know where Main Street is?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cYes.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cDo you know where Magnolia Avenue is?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cYes.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cThat\u2019s where we are.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWell, I\u2019m standing at that intersection and I can\u2019t find your store. Is it underground or something?\u201d<\/p>\n
I look outside and see a woman who looks lost. \u201cMa\u2019am, turn to your left.\u201d I start waving. \u201cDo you see a man in a green apron waving at you?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cYes.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cThat man is inside a Starbucks.\u00a0Go there.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cThat\u2019s not Starbucks. That\u2019s Quizno\u2019s.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cMa\u2019am, I\u2019m very confident I\u2019m in a Starbucks right now.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cYou\u2019re not very helpful.\u201d<\/p>\n
6. A lady called in to tell me her computer had been taken over by the Matrix. I asked her to move her mouse. \u201cOh my god! It\u2019s back to normal! How did you do that?\u201d \u201cMa\u2019am, I\u2019m guessing someone installed a Matrix screensaver on your computer. Anything else I can help you with today?\u201d<\/p>\n
7. At a clothing store, a customer asked me, \u201cIf these t-shirts are buy one get one free, why can\u2019t I just have the free one?\u201d<\/p>\n
8. I once had a customer bring back a laptop she bought the day before claiming it was broken. She said it wouldn\u2019t open. I asked her if it was an issue with Windows or if there was a program that wasn\u2019t loading. She said the laptop itself wouldn\u2019t physically open. I took the laptop out of the box, opened it, and looked at her. Her mouth fell open and she said, \u201cOhhh, it opens on that side! My sister and I tried for an hour to open it up last night and we couldn\u2019t.\u201d They had been trying to open it from the hinge side.<\/p>\n
9. While working at a Disney theme park, I got asked what time the three o\u2019clock parade started. I had to answer with that famous Disney smile.<\/p>\n
10. At RadioShack, I had a lady come in and ask for a radio capable of getting broadcasts from the Middle East. After I showed her a few, she purchased one and asked me to help her tune it. I found some stations from various Middle Eastern sources and tuned them for her as she stood there with this puzzled look on her face. When I asked her what was wrong, she looked at me with this seriously grim expression and asked, \u201cHow am I supposed to track terrorists if they don\u2019t speak American?\u201d<\/p>\n
11. One time, a customer asked me how much it would cost to have the Plasma truck come out and refill his Plasma TV.<\/p>\n
12. Not a customer, but a client, taped an Ethernet cable to the window, thinking it would give them better Wi-Fi reception.<\/p>\n
13.\u00a0 At a Canadian Tire, someone tried to return a flashlight to the customer service desk, claiming it wouldn\u2019t light up. I looked down at the flashlight.\u00a0It was a hose nozzle.<\/p>\n
14. When working Windows 98 tech support, I was asked by an older man, \u201cWhat time does the Internet close?\u201d I was so dumbfounded that I couldn\u2019t come up with a witty response.<\/p>\n
15. I was at a snack bar for my pool one summer and a woman asked me what end of a hot dog you are supposed to look through.<\/p>\n
16. Working at a sandwich shop, a customer asked me, \u201cI\u2019m not that hungry, which is bigger? The half sandwich or he whole sandwich?\u201d<\/p>\n
17. A customer once told me they felt bad when they returned a DVD and forgot to rewind it.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
1. While working at Best Buy, a woman came in complaining that her iPod had a virus. I turn it on and it appears to be working fine. She says it only shows up when she connects it to her PC, so I hook it up to our machine. Once connected, the \u201cDo not disconnect\u201d … Continue reading Stupid customers from across the country<\/span>