These are classified ads which were actually placed in Newspapers:<\/p>\n
FREE YORKSHIRE TERRIER.
\n8 years old, Hateful little rascale Bites!
\n___________________________________________
\nFREE PUPPIES
\n1\/2 Cocker Spaniel, 1\/2 sneaky neighbour’s dog.
\n________________________________________________
\nFREE PUPPIES. Mother is a nel Club registered German Shepherd.
\nFather is a Super Dog, able to leap tall fences in a single bound.
\n_______________________________________________________
\nCOWS, CALVES: NEVER BRED. Also 1 gay bull for sale.
\n________________________________________________________
\nJOINING NUDIST COLONY!
\nMust sell washer and dryer \u00a3100.
\n_____________________________________________________________
\nWEDDING DRESS FOR SALE ..
\nWorn once by mistake.
\nCall Stephanie.
\n___________________________________________________________
\nAnd the WINNER is…<\/p>\n
FOR SALE BY OWNER. Complete set of Encyclopedia Britannica, 45 Thought from the Greatest Living Scottish Thinker–Billy Connolly.<\/p>\n “If women are so bloody perfect at multitasking, how come they can’t have a headache and sex at the same time?”<\/p>\n ____________________________________________________________<\/p>\n TEACHER: Why are you late? ____________________________________________ __________________________________________ TEACHER: Millie, give me a sentence starting with ‘ I ‘ TEACHER: Harold, what do you call a person who keeps on talking when\u00a0people\u00a0are no longer interested? These are classified ads which were actually placed in Newspapers: FREE YORKSHIRE TERRIER. 8 years old, Hateful little rascale Bites! ___________________________________________ FREE PUPPIES 1\/2 Cocker Spaniel, 1\/2 sneaky neighbour’s dog. ________________________________________________ FREE PUPPIES. Mother is a nel Club registered German Shepherd. Father is a Super Dog, able to leap tall fences in a single bound. … Continue reading BRITISH HUMOR IS DIFFERENT. From Mom<\/span>
\nvolumes.\u00a0Excellent condition, \u00a3200 or best offer.
\nNo longer needed, got married, wife knows everything.
\n(Statement of the Century)
\n___________________________________________________________<\/span><\/p>\nChildren Are Quick<\/h5>\n
\nSTUDENT: Class started before I got here.
\n____________________________________
\nTEACHER: Why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor?
\nJOHN: You told me to do it without using tables.
\n__________________________________________
\nTEACHER: Glen, how do you spell ‘crocodile?’<\/span>
\nGLEN:\u00a0K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L’<\/span>
\nTEACHER: No, that’s wrong
\n<\/span>GLEN: Maybe it is wrong, but you asked me how I spell it.
\n<\/span><\/span>(I Love this child)<\/span> \u00a0I think my Mom put this one in!<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n
\nTEACHER: Donald, what is the chemical formula for water?
\nDONALD: H I J K L M N O.
\nTEACHER: What are you talking about?
\nDONALD: Yesterday, you said it’s H to O.
\n__________________________________
\nTEACHER: Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we\u00a0didn’t have ten years ago.
\nWINNIE: Me!<\/p>\n
\nTEACHER: Glen, why do you always get so dirty?<\/span>
\n GLEN: Well, I’m a lot closer to the ground than you are.<\/span>
\nI’m sure my mom had something to do with these, that’s 2.<\/span>
\n_______________________________________<\/span><\/p>\n
\nMILLIE: I is…
\nTEACHER: No, Millie….. Always say, ‘I am.’
\nMILLIE: All right… ‘I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.’
\n________________________________
\nTEACHER: George Washington not only chopped down his father’s\u00a0cherry tree,\u00a0but also admitted it. Now, Louie, do you know why his father didn’t\u00a0punish\u00a0him?
\nLOUIS: Because George still had the axe in his hand……
\n______________________________________
\nTEACHER: Now, Simon, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before\u00a0eating?
\nSIMON: No sir, I don’t have to, my Mom is a good cook.
\n______________________________
\nTEACHER: Your composition on ‘My Dog’ is exactly the same as your\u00a0brother’s.\u00a0Did you copy his?
\nJohn: No, sir. It’s the same dog.
\n___________________________________<\/p>\n
\nHAROLD: A teacher<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"