{"id":9393,"date":"2015-11-28T08:40:02","date_gmt":"2015-11-28T15:40:02","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/the-glen-blog.com\/?p=9393"},"modified":"2015-11-28T08:40:02","modified_gmt":"2015-11-28T15:40:02","slug":"funny-shit-3","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/the-glen-blog.com\/?p=9393","title":{"rendered":"Funny Shit"},"content":{"rendered":"<div class=\"article-block \">\n<div class=\"article-html\">\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"http:\/\/images1.tickld.com\/live\/articles\/beyonce_12dafb5216d3e94386ce8155970685ea.jpg\" alt=\"\" \/><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">A woman goes to her boyfriend&#8217;s parents&#8217; house for Thanksgiving dinner.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">This is to be her first time meeting the family and she is very nervous. They all sit down and begin eating a fine meal.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">The woman is beginning to feel a little discomfort, thanks to her nervousness and the broccoli casserole. The gas pains are almost making her eyes water. Left with no other choice, she decides to relieve herself a bit and lets out a dainty fart.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">It wasn&#8217;t loud, but everyone at the table heard the poof. Before she even had a chance to be embarrassed, her boyfriend&#8217;s father looked over at the dog that had been snoozing under the woman&#8217;s chair, and said in a rather stern voice, &#8220;Skippy!&#8221;.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<div class=\"article-block \">\n<div class=\"article-html\">\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">The woman thought, &#8220;This is great!&#8221; and a big smile came across her face. A couple of minutes later, she was beginning to feel the pain again. This time, she didn&#8217;t even hesitate. She let a much louder and longer rrrrrip.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">The father again looked at the dog and yelled, &#8220;Dammit Skippy!&#8221; Once again the woman smiled and thought &#8220;Yes!&#8221; A few minutes later the woman had to let another rip. This time she didn&#8217;t even think about it. She let a fart rip that rivaled a train whistle blowing.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\">Once again, the father looked at the dog with disgust and yelled, &#8220;Dammit Skippy, get away from her, before she craps on you!&#8221;<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>A woman goes to her boyfriend&#8217;s parents&#8217; house for Thanksgiving dinner. This is to be her first time meeting the family and she is very nervous. They all sit down and begin eating a fine meal. The woman is beginning to feel a little discomfort, thanks to her nervousness and the broccoli casserole. The gas &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/the-glen-blog.com\/?p=9393\" class=\"more-link\">Continue reading <span class=\"screen-reader-text\">Funny Shit<\/span> <span class=\"meta-nav\">&rarr;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[4],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/the-glen-blog.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/9393"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/the-glen-blog.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/the-glen-blog.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/the-glen-blog.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/the-glen-blog.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=9393"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/the-glen-blog.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/9393\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":9394,"href":"https:\/\/the-glen-blog.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/9393\/revisions\/9394"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/the-glen-blog.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=9393"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/the-glen-blog.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=9393"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/the-glen-blog.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=9393"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}