{"id":9531,"date":"2015-12-21T15:52:47","date_gmt":"2015-12-21T22:52:47","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/the-glen-blog.com\/?p=9531"},"modified":"2015-12-21T15:52:47","modified_gmt":"2015-12-21T22:52:47","slug":"ho-ho-ho-2","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/the-glen-blog.com\/?p=9531","title":{"rendered":"Ho Ho Ho"},"content":{"rendered":"<ul>\n<li style=\"text-align: justify;\">I was Santa @ Harley yesterday. It was a traumatic experience for some kids. \u00a0One kid thrashed about so much while I was holding him that his diaper and pants fell off, All the employees were laughing their asses off, thinking that I cared that I was holding a kid that was naked from the waist down, but I am a parent and grandparent and this wasn&#8217;t my first rodeo. It&#8217;s when the kid started pissing that I showed my true experience, I pointed him at his mother and he peed on her leg. A true iPhone experience for the mother. Thank God the beard covered my face. I&#8217;m going to claim it was Herbie that played Santa.<\/li>\n<li style=\"text-align: justify;\">We had so few kids that after 3 hours I was told I could stop. I&#8217;m still pulling white plastic hair from between my teeth. Crappy costume was hotter than hell and fit like shit, but I managed to pull it off.<\/li>\n<li style=\"text-align: justify;\">One of the pictures made it to FB before I even had the crappy beard off, Tori, and that asshole Johnson had to comment on it. I may be fat, but he&#8217;s bald and old looking and I can always loose weigh. . . . who am I kidding, I&#8217;ll be fat till I die &amp; I still look better than that pecker.<\/li>\n<li style=\"text-align: justify;\">I did drive a Ultra off the floor and through the front doors while it was slow and I cruised around waving at cars and kids in the playground. Two of the salesgirls helped me steal the bike. I was told if I don&#8217;t bring it back I&#8217;ll have to pay for it.<\/li>\n<li style=\"text-align: justify;\">I tried out a Sportster too, but that never made it out of the parking lot.<\/li>\n<li style=\"text-align: justify;\">Banking today.<\/li>\n<li style=\"text-align: justify;\">Erin&#8217;s back.<\/li>\n<li style=\"text-align: justify;\">Erin and Nina wrapped a present for Erin&#8217;s doll, Cindy, and she wasn&#8217;t allowed to see what Erin bought her. If Cindy reads this blog, ERIN BOUGHT YOU A BED AND A PILLOW!<\/li>\n<li style=\"text-align: justify;\">There may be some slight exaggeration to some of the above. This is my blog and I can lie if I want to. I did not lie about Johnson being an asshole though.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I was Santa @ Harley yesterday. It was a traumatic experience for some kids. \u00a0One kid thrashed about so much while I was holding him that his diaper and pants fell off, All the employees were laughing their asses off, thinking that I cared that I was holding a kid that was naked from the &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/the-glen-blog.com\/?p=9531\" class=\"more-link\">Continue reading <span class=\"screen-reader-text\">Ho Ho Ho<\/span> <span class=\"meta-nav\">&rarr;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[4],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/the-glen-blog.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/9531"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/the-glen-blog.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/the-glen-blog.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/the-glen-blog.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/the-glen-blog.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=9531"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/the-glen-blog.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/9531\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":9532,"href":"https:\/\/the-glen-blog.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/9531\/revisions\/9532"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/the-glen-blog.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=9531"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/the-glen-blog.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=9531"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/the-glen-blog.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=9531"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}