All posts by Glen

Just a former garbageman living in New Mexico selling crap to tourists and locals alike.
B.S. & Political Ridicule

Yesterday

  • Yes, I did work the gay rodeo on Friday afternoon.
  • I was there for Santa Fe Harley-Davidson with the jump start and a Street 500.
  • I’m thinking that the Zia Rodeo was not the venue for the jump start. Not that gays are against motorcycle riding, it’s just that they were there for the horses and the party afterwards.
  • When I got home, the following conversation happened.
    Me: I’m home.  Nina: How was it? Did you have fun? Me: Yes, it was nice. No real play on the jumpstart, but I had fun talking to people. Nina: Did you get lucky? Me: What?!  Nina: You know, anyone special, fun behind the bleachers? Me: We spend way too much time together, you’re becoming a real smart ass!
  • Not sure what the weekend brings for us.  The Ole Fartz are planning a ride to Taos tomorrow. We may do that, or I may do that, depending on what Nina feels like.
B.S. & Political Ridicule

When you are almost 80…Who Cares?

I was standing at the bar one night minding my own business.
This FAT ugly chick came up behind me, grabbed my behind and said,
“You’re kinda cute. You gotta phone number?”
I said, “Yeah, you gotta pen?”
She said, “Yeah, I got a pen”.
I said, “You better get back in it before the farmer misses you.”
Cost me 6 stitches but when you’re almost eighty…who cares?
**********

Cowboy: “Give me 3 packets of condoms, please.”
Lady Cashier: “Do you need a paper bag with that, sir?”
Cowboy: “Nah. She’s purty good lookin’.”
When you’re almost eighty…who cares?
***********

I was talking to a young woman in the bar last night.
She said, “If you lost a few pounds, had a shave and got your hair cut,
You’d look all right.”
I said, “If I did that, I’d be talking to your friends over there instead of you.”
Cost me a fat lip but, when you’re almost eighty…who cares?
**********

I was telling a woman in the pub about my ability to guess what day a woman
Was born just by feeling her breasts.
“Really” she said, “Go on then. Try.”
After about thirty seconds of fondling she began to lose patience and said,
“Come on, what day was I born?”
I said, “Yesterday.”
Cost me a kick in the nuts, but when you’re almost eighty…who cares?
***********

I got caught taking a pee in the swimming pool today.
The lifeguard shouted at me so loud, I nearly fell in.
Cost me a bloody nose. But when you’re almost eighty who cares?
***********

I went to the pub last night and saw a BIG woman dancing on a table.
I said, “Good legs.”
The girl giggled and said, “Do you really think so?”
I said, “Definitely! Most tables would have collapsed by now.”
Cost me 6 more stitches. But when you’re almost eighty…who cares?
***********

B.S. & Political Ridicule

This is good.

LETTERMAN’S TOP 10 REASONS TO VOTE DEMOCRAT!! 
Every person should read    😇

#10. I vote Democrat because I love the fact that I can now marry whatever I want. I’ve decided to marry my German Shepherd.

# 9. I vote Democrat because I believe oil companies profits of 4% on a gallon of gas are obscene, but the government taxing the same gallon at 15% isn’t.

# 8. I vote Democrat because I believe the government will do a better job of spending the money I earn than I would.

# 7. I vote Democrat because Freedom of Speech is fine as long as nobody is offended by it.

# 6. I vote Democrat because I’m way too irresponsible to own a gun, and I know that my local police are all I need to protect me from murderers and thieves. I am also thankful that we have a 911 service that gets police to your home in order to identify your body after a home invasion.

# 5. I vote Democrat because I’m not concerned about millions of babies being aborted so long as we keep all death row inmates alive and comfy.

# 4. I vote Democrat because I think illegal aliens have a right to free health care, education, and Social Security benefits, and we should take away Social Security from those who paid into it.

# 3. I vote Democrat because I believe that businesses should not be allowed to make profits for themselves. They need to break even and give the rest away to the government for redistribution as the Democrat Party sees fit.

# 2. I vote Democrat because I believe liberal judges need to rewrite the Constitution every few days to suit fringe kooks who would never get their agendas past the voters.

…And, the #1 reason I vote Democrat is because I think it’s better to pay $billions$ for oil to people who hate us, but not drill our own because it might upset some endangered beetle, gopher, or fish here in America. We don’t care about the beetles, gophers, or fish in those other countries.

B.S. & Political Ridicule

Santa Fe

Power was out there for most of the evening. A lightning strike in Albuquerque was blamed. Many friends effected.

My “Hillary For Prison 2016” sign in my car continues to annoy liberals. Some New York hillary ass kisser passed my on the highway and then slowed down and he and his wife both flipped me off. Made my day.