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Monthly Archives: October 2016
True Story!
Pinocchio, Snow White and Superman are out for a stroll in town one day. As they walk, they come across a sign:
“Beauty contest for the most beautiful woman in the world.”
“I am entering” said Snow White.
After half an hour she comes out and they ask her, “Well, how did you do?”
” First Place ,” said Snow White.
They continue walking and they see a sign: “Contest for the strongest man in the world.”
“I’m entering,”says Superman. After half an hour he returns and they ask him, “How did you make out?”
” First Place ,” answers Superman. “Did you ever doubt?”
They continue walking when they see a sign: “Contest! Who is the greatest liar in the world?”
Pinocchio says “this is mine.” Half an hour later, he returns with tears in his eyes.
“What happened?” they asked.
“Who the hell is Hillary Clinton?” asked Pinocchio.
From Mom
DIVORCE AGREEMENT ~
WRITTEN BY A YOUNG COLLEGE STUDENT…
The person who wrote this is a college (law) student. Perhaps there is hope for us after all.
THIS IS SO INCREDIBLY WELL PUT AND I CAN HARDLY BELIEVE IT’S BY A YOUNG PERSON, A STUDENT! WHATEVER HE RUNS FOR, I’LL VOTE FOR HIM.
Dear American liberals, leftists, social progressives, socialists, Marxists and Obama supporters, et al:
We have stuck together since the late 1950’s for the sake of the kids, but the whole of this latest election process has made me realize that I want a divorce. I know we tolerated each other for many years for the sake of future generations, but sadly, this relationship has clearly run its course.
Our two ideological sides of America cannot and will not ever agree on what is right for us all, so let’s just end it on friendly terms. We can smile and chalk it up to irreconcilable differences and go our own way.
Here is our separation agreement:
–Our two groups can equitably divide up the country by landmass each taking a similar portion. That will be the difficult part, but I am sure our two sides can come to a friendly agreement. After that, it should be relatively easy! Our respective representatives can effortlessly divide other assets since both sides have such distinct and disparate tastes.
–We don’t like re-distributive taxes so you can keep them.
–You are welcome to the liberal judges and the ACLU.
–Since you hate guns and war, we’ll take our firearms, the cops, the NRA, and the military.
–We’ll take the nasty, smelly oil industry and the coal mines, and you can go with wind, solar and bio-diesel.
–You can keep Oprah, Michael Moore and Rosie O’Donnell. You are, however, responsible for finding a bio-diesel vehicle big enough to move all three of them.
–We’ll keep capitalism, greedy corporations, pharmaceutical companies, Wal-Mart and Wall Street.
–You can have your beloved lifelong welfare dwellers, food stamps, hippies, druggies and illegal aliens.
–We’ll keep the hot Alaskan hockey moms, greedy CEOs, and rednecks.
–We’ll keep Bill OâReilly and Bibles, and give you NBC and Hollywood.
–You can make nice with Iran and Palestine and we’ll retain the right to invade and hammer places that threaten us.
–You can have the peaceniks and war protesters.
–When our allies or our way of life are under assault, we’ll help provide them security.
–We’ll keep our Judeo-Christian values.
–You are welcome to Radical Islam, Scientology, Humanism, political correctness and Shirley McClain. You can also have the U.N. but we will no longer be paying the bill.
–We’ll keep the SUV’s, pickup trucks and oversized luxury cars. You can take every Volt Tesla and Leaf you can find.
–You can give everyone healthcare if you can find any practicing doctors.
–We’ll keep “The Battle Hymn of the Republic” and “The National
Anthem.”
–I’m sure you’ll be happy to substitute “Imagine,” “I’d Like to Teach the World to Sing,” “Kumbaya,” or “We Are the World.”
–We’ll practice trickle-down economics and you can continue to give trickle up poverty your best shot.
–Since it often so offends you, we’ll keep our history, our name and our flag.
Would you agree to this? If so, please pass it along to other like-minded liberal and conservative patriots and if you do not agree, just hit delete. In the spirit of friendly parting, I’ll bet you might think about which one of us will need whose help in 15 years.
Sincerely,
John J. Wall
Law Student and an American
P. S. Also, please take Ted Turner, Sean Penn, Martin & Charlie Sheen, George Clooney, Barbara Streisand, and (Hanoi) Jane Fonda with you..
P.S.S. And you won’t have to press 1 for English when you call our country.
Nice Ride With Nina Today
We took off around 8:30 and headed to Vegas for breakfast. It turns out that one for he waitresses there is a gossip and since I didn’t know that, I talked to her. I should find out in the next day or so if this will bite me in the ass.
After leaving Vegas, we headed to the High Road to Taos for a relaxing ride. Skipping the “to Taos” part of the ride, we headed the other way and pointed the bike west.
Since I now have a selfie stick, I stopped for some pictures along the way. I need practice it appears. I can get the picture centered and all, but I keep forgetting to smile.
We stopped for lunch in La Mesita on one of the local Pueblos. I’ve been there before and had amazing fried chicken, but today it was just good. Nice place. Very good menu.
Afterwards, we just headed home. almost 200 miles with my favorite riding partner!
Wrong Way on I-25! & Other Stuff.
- I was asked to deliver a custom ordered bikes to Taos today and on my way in I was startled to be facing a wrong way driver on I-25! I moved over and got by him safely, but at my speed and his speed combined, it would have been fatal for both of us.
- I called the state police immediately and reported him, but I was so shaken I had to dial 911 three times to get it right. Not sure if the cops caught him or not. Scary shit!
- I delivered the bike and met a possible new HOG member. He’s the police chief for Taos Ski Village. Heck of a nice guy.
- I had to use my vehicle and trailer for the delivery since one of the store owners had the Ford and the trailer I usually use. It worked out better for me. I went home a different way and got home faster and broke out my bike for a short ride of 100 miles.
Cameras.
Well, I just installed 4 new outdoor cameras and hope to install 1 more before I call it a day. I now have 3 out front and 1 out back and will install the last one on the side that will show Tori’s place and the road to the storage units.
The Umbrella – A Touching Story…
On a rainy afternoon, a group of protesters were gathered outside the grocery store handing out pamphlets on the evils of America. I politely declined to take one.
There was an elderly woman behind me, and a young (20-ish) female protester offered her a pamphlet, which she politely declined.
The young protester gently put her hand on the old woman’s shoulder and in a patronizing voice said, “Don’t you care about the children of Iraq?”
The old woman looked up at her and said: “Honey, my father died in France during World War II, I lost my husband in Korea, and a son in Vietnam. All three died so a naive, ignorant, self centered bimbo like you could have the right to stand here and badmouth our country, and if you touch me again, I’ll shove this umbrella up your ass and open it.”
God Bless America!