B.S. & Political Ridicule

Letter to the editor

The below was mailed to the editor of the Orange County Register in response to many pro-immigration letters posted in their paper. This letter was rejected. I can’t imagine why.

Dear Editor:
So many letter writers have based their arguments on how this land is made up of immigrants. Ernie Lujan for one, suggests we should tear down the Statue of Liberty because the people now in question aren’t being treated the same as those who passed through Ellis Island and other ports of entry. 

Maybe we should turn to our history books and point out to people like Mr. Lujan why today’s American is not willing to accept this new kind of immigrant any longer. Back in 1900 when there was a rush from all areas of Europe to come to the United States, people had to get off a ship and stand in a long line in New York and be documented. Some would even get down on their hands and knees and kiss the ground. They made a pledge to uphold the laws and support their new country in good and bad times. They made learning English a primary rule in their new American households and some even changed their names to blend in with their new home. 

They had waved good bye to their birth place to give their children a new life and did everything in their power to help their children assimilate into one culture. Nothing was handed to them. No free lunches, no welfare, no labor laws
to protect them. All they had were the skills and craftsmanship they had brought with them to trade for a future of prosperity. 

Most of their children came of age when World War II broke out. My father fought alongside men whose parents had come straight over from Germany , Italy , France and Japan . None of these 1st generation Americans ever gave any thought about what country their parents had come from. They were Americans fighting Hitler, Mussolini and the Emperor of Japan . They were defending the United States of America as one people. 

When we liberated France , no one in those villages was looking for the French-American or the German American or the Irish American. The people of France saw only Americans. And we carried one flag that represented one country. Not one of those immigrant sons would have thought about picking up another country’s flag and waving it to represent who they
were. It would have been a disgrace to their parents who had sacrificed so much to be here. These immigrants truly knew what it meant to be an American. They stirred the melting pot into one red, white and blue bowl. 

And here we are with a new kind of immigrant who wants the same rights and privileges. Only they want to achieve it by playing with a different set of rules, one that includes the entitlement card and a guarantee of being faithful to their mother country. I’m sorry, that’s not what being an American is all about. I believe that the immigrants who landed on Ellis Island in the early 1900’s deserve better than that for all the toil, hard work and sacrifice in raising future generations to create a land that has become a beacon for those legally searching for a better life. I think they would be appalled that they are being used as an example by those waving foreign country flags. 

And for that suggestion about taking down the Statue of Liberty , it happens to mean a lot to the citizens who are voting on the immigration bill. I wouldn’t start talking about dismantling the United States just yet. 

(signed)
Rosemary LaBonte 

Amen Rosemary!

B.S. & Political Ridicule

Norwegian Math Test . . .

A Norwegian Math Test — This only works for those in Minnna soda, Nort DaKoda, or Viskonsin dont cha know! Verks 4 me.

Ole, a Norwegian fella wants a job, but the foreman doesn’t want to hire him, so he says he won’t hire him until he passes a little math test. Here is your first question, the foreman said. ‘Without using numbers, represent the number 9.’

‘Witout numbers?’ The Norwegian says, ‘Dat’s easy.’ and proceeds to draw three trees.

ATT00031

What’s this?’ the boss asks.

Vot! You got no brain? Tree and tree and tree make nine,’ says the Norwegian.

‘Fair enough,’ says the boss. ‘Here’s your second question. Use the same rules, but this time represent
the number 99.’

The Norwegian stares into space for a while, then picks up the picture that he has just drawn and makes a smudge on each tree. ‘Dar ya go!’

ATT00028
The boss scratches his head and says, ‘How on earth do you get that to represent 99?’

‘You must be from Iowa.  Each of Da trees is dirty now. So, it’s dirty tree, and dirty tree, and dirty tree. Dat is 99.’

The boss is getting worried that he’s going to actually have to hire this Norwegian, so he says, ‘All right, last question. Same rules again, but represent the number 100.’

The Norwegian fella stares into space some more, then he picks up the picture again and makes a little mark at the base of each tree and says, ‘Dar ya go! Von hundred!’

ATT00034

The boss looks at the attempt. ‘You must be nuts if you think that represents a hundred!’

The Norwegian winces and shakes his head. UFF-DAH! you must be a Finlander from Iowa; he leans forward and points to the marks at the base of each tree and says, ‘A little dog come along and pooped by each tree. So now you got dirty tree and a turd, dirty tree and a turd, and dirty tree and a turd, and dat makes von hundred!!
So, ven do I start.

B.S. & Political Ridicule

The 3 Stooges

  • As I sit here and type this I am watching  the 3 Stooges.
  • I am wondering why I enjoyed this show in the past.
  • I’ll keep watching as I finish this post.
  • I’m not sure if I mentioned this earlier here, and I’m too lazy to go back and check, but our June trip to the Netherlands is now a September trip to London and the Netherlands. We’ll do a week in each place with London’s Heathrow Airport as our arrival and departure point.
  • We plan on staying in Leewaurden the entire time in the Holland. Since the country is so small, we can easily drive to any place we need to go for the day.
  • Yes, I’m going to rent a car for this trip. The better to explore with in my mind.
  • Still not getting my past attraction to the Stooges.
  • Tomorrow is Erinday again. I like having her here. I think for fun I may try to get Will to sign off on a passport for Erin.
  • If this flies, maybe I’ll use air miles to take her to London. That should crank their asses.
  • I changed the channel finally. Couldn’t take it. Wasted youth.
  • I’m now watching How It’s Made. Always an interesting watch.
  • Still have to book the last hotel for our September trip. We’ve got the first London hotel booked, the Holiday Inn Express~Camden Locks. This was picked for the location over the hotel amenities.
  • In Leewaurden we’re staying at the hotel across from the train station, the same one we spent a night at years ago.
  • Nina’s picking the last hotel. She gave me a list to check out today. We’ll see what she chose.
The best cure for sea sickness, is to sit under a tree.
Jokes

SISTERS OF ST. FRANCIS – HOUSE OF PROSTITUTION

A man is driving down a deserted stretch of highway when he notices a sign out of the corner of his eye.

It reads:
SISTERS OF ST. FRANCIS – HOUSE OF PROSTITUTION – 10 MILES

He thinks this is a figment of his imagination and drives on without second thought.
Soon he sees another sign which reads:

SISTERS OF ST. FRANCIS – HOUSE OF PROSTITUTION – 5 MILES

Suddenly he begins to realize that these signs are for real and drives past a third sign saying:

SISTERS OF ST. FRANCIS HOUSE OF PROSTITUTION – NEXT RIGHT

His curiosity gets the best of him and he pulls into the drive.

On the far side of the parking lot is a stone building with a small sign next to the door reading:

SISTERS OF ST. FRANCIS

He climbs the steps and rings the bell.

The door is answered by a nun in a long black habit who asks,
‘What may we do for you! my son?’
He answers, ‘I saw your signs along the highway and was interested in possibly doing business.’
‘Very well my son. Please follow me.’

He is led through many winding passages and is soon quite disoriented.

The nun stops at a closed door and tells the man, ‘Please knock on this door.’

He does so and another nun in a long habit, holding a tin cup answers the door.This nun instructs,

‘Please place $100 in the cup then go through the large wooden door at the end of the hallway.’
He puts $100 in the cup, eagerly trots down the hall and slips through the door pulling it shut behind him.
The door locks, and he finds himself back in the parking lot facing another sign:

GO IN PEACE. YOU HAVE JUST BEEN SCREWED BY THE SISTERS OF ST. FRANCIS.
SERVES YOU RIGHT, YOU SINNER…

B.S. & Political Ridicule, PIctures

Our Summer Ad

We’re going to advertise in the area tourism rag this year and see if there’s any benefit for us in doing so. This guide will distribute 40,000 copies all through the state and if needed they will do a second printing. Our ad is 7.25″ X 2″ and I hope to have it positioned on the page opposite of the City/County ad.  I think that I have the clout to see that happen.

LVF-ADClick on the picture to see the full size if you’re interested. I sent this out to the publishers and now I wait until they let me know what they think.

 

B.S. & Political Ridicule

R.I.P. Mr. Johnson

Family & friends are mourning the loss of Edward Johnson Sr. who passed this morning at 7:45. I too mourn his passing. He was like a second father to me in many ways.

Failing health that was caused by a medication mix up a few years back that started the decline.

He and Dad shared a birthday.

Mr. J. you will be missed.

I am a husband, father, grandfather, friend, business owner, traveller, Harley rider, citizen, patriot, gun owner, politically eclectic person of strange personal habits. I support police, trust no politicians, and can argue any side of an argument just to amuse myself. People love me or hate me and those that are in-between don't know me.